There is a very real side to this lifestyle I have chosen, every now and again you have a bad week, especially after coming back from a solo vacation. Part of my purpose for writing this blog is to share my full journey, not just the places I have visited.
By the time I arrived at work this past Monday I was in tears, another week has past since my return home from Greece and I am no closer to leaving this island. I struggle daily with having the full focus to write this blog, learning about it and how I can create a stronger presence. Curious to know what I am going to do in the future and how long can I work at a job I do not like. It offers me no growth or support, nothing has changed over the past year. In true honesty nothing has changed in my life either, until recently. If I look back to a year ago I am having the same issues with a man(different one), doing the same thing most everyday after work, the job is slightly different and I am definitely not happy.
As stated I started this journey in 2007 in Grand Cayman and left in 2009, as well as in 2014. I came back here for a job offer Nov/14 after some hard times over the span of 2 years and being completely broke. The current job I have is the result of another job gone bad. By the time I left them they owed me over $10000. I needed a job and there was one on the table, one I knew. Shit the menu hadn’t changed since I left in 2009. So I took it. It would be easy for me to fall into the comfortability I have in my life, actually I have fallen into it. I have a car, a 2 bedroom apartment I can afford to rent, health insurance, a job I could do in my sleep, I live in a beautiful location that people spend thousands of dollars to visit. I live in a great neighborhood, I can walk to the beach and I even have a cat. Why can’t I just be happy here?
Where am I going to go? What will I do? And Chloe (my cat)? Can I write a book? Do I have a story to tell? After ten years of travel will I ever be happy in one place, is it possible for me to make a life from travel and cooking….
I am craving a new place a new adventure. A place where I can meet new people and discover new things. I have been in this place before and have learned to trust and be open. To learn from my moments of sadness and depression, where I feel completely lost and alone. I should know by now without any question that I will be guided, especially if I let go and allow myself to live in the moment. To stop trying to control and force an outcome. Recognize my journey is not the same as yours or even yours, each of us has our own. I am chosing this platform to share mine.